Thats quite hard and yap... every ones passing through this stage and suffering alone.
If u really wanna change then u gotta defeat your self.
I advise u to write daily diary entries to your self and explain all of your feelings abt hows your day going.....( Cz i did it myself...I wrote letters to my future self...kinda childish i know but yet it feels that u are literally talking to someone who u can trust)