Hey. Welcome to Book 2.
In the last book, a ton of cool stuff happened. I got yelled at. A... lot of times. Sometimes... a little worse than others. But that's perfectly okay, because everything worked out okay in the end, right?
No.
I made a pretty big mistake last book. On the last day of school, I told Caitlyn to go to hell. And then I lost her. Big mistake, huh? Eh, don't worry. That's pretty small. I'm gonna warn you: I'm gonna make a lot, a LOT of mistakes in the future. No, really, terrible, I mean TERRIBLE mistakes. They aren't nearly as bad as that time when I called Caitlyn fa-HEAVY (even though I was just exaggerating), don't worry. Enough with the absolutely hilarious jokes I'm making, I do make a ton of hilariously bad mistakes later on in the story. So, you know, just, uh, be prepared. For me, I guess.
ALRIGHT LET'S STOP BEING SAD AND BE HAPPY
So... the last chapter of last book finished on the last day of the school (or the afternoon after scho- you know what I mean), and since this is a new book, this is a different year. I didn't mention that last book, but, yeah, each book covers a different year. Sorry for forgetting. So, yeah, this is a new year. It's fifth grade time, baby.
I would probably start singing about how awesome fifth grade was, like some kind of lunatic, but for now, I'll restrain myself from annoying you. I'll annoy you later in a couple of chapters.
Singing? Wait, hold on, that reminds me of one story- actually, I can talk about that later. Right now, it's time to talk about fifth grade.
Uh... where do I start? Let's see, fifth grade, fifth grade, what happened that year? I'm joking, of course I know what happened that year. Just struggling a little to start. Oh! I know!
I walked into my first class, and class started. The teacher began talking, and I looked around class. As I looked around the room, I noticed a certain someone... wasn't there.
Caitlyn... wasn't in my Language Arts class.
Or English class, as some people would call it. That's not the point- she's not here! That's kind of a problem in a few ways!
That's okay, she can still be in my math class- that's not how it works. I discussed this last book. You share all classes you have with the same people. So... I didn't have any classes with Caitlyn! Oh, I didn't... have any classes... with Caitlyn... I'll never get to say how much I... lovHATE HER LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL
It's fine! That's okay! I've still got recess and lunch with her (great, recess is where most of the stories in the last book happened anyway) and maybe even P.E. with her. Who knows?
Nope. I didn't have P.E. with her. Know who I did have it with?
Anna. Of course.
Uggggggh yeah, she's still in this book. Sorry, Anna-haters, but your least favorite character still exists in this timeline.
Anyway... so I didn't have any classes with Caitlyn. What was I gonna do about it?
"You gonna cry?"
"Funny, Anna."
It was still the first day of school, and we had P.E. today. The coaches had us play a game where there were two teams, which splitted the class in half. I was miraculously put on the same team as Anna, so now I had the chance to talk to her. I was mostly talking about how bored I was ever since school started, and I was also complaining about not knowing why I was so bored.
"Mm... I think I know why you're so bored."
"You do?"
"You haven't talked to Caitlyn in like... 3 months!"
"Oh, my god, Anna, that's not-"
"I think you should talk to her!"
"No, Anna, that's just dumb."
I rolled my eyes and got ready as the game was about to start. Anna retaliated, hitting a low blow.
"Aren't you the dumb one who told Caitlyn to go to hell?"
And Anna gets the first swear word of the book. Congrats.
"I- how did you know that?!"
Pfft, how else? Caitlyn told her, obviously.
"Umm, I don't know. Someone told me."
Told you.
"Fine, fine, whatever. When should I talk to her?"
"You know, recess?"
its alwAYS RECESS
"Okay, fine."
So, I'm gonna try to talk to Caitlyn. 3 months later after I last talked to her. 3 months after I rej... yeah. That thing. Okay, how should I start the conversation?
"'Hey, shortie-' okay I'm just being stupid at this point."
I was rambling to myself, but that reminds me. I think I sorta covered it, but... Caitlyn was taller than me in fourth grade. I think. But now I'm taller than her! Much taller! Ha! Well, at least I think I was taller. I was definitely at least the same height as her. Uh, back to my rambling.
"How about... 'Catilyn? Hey, it's, uh, me. Sorry about... earlier... well, no, sorry about everything that happened a while ago... I think... uh'"
As you can tell, I'm still great with words.
"No, I can't- I have to be strong! Brave! Like this: 'Caitlyn, I'm sorry about telling you to go to... h...' never mind, I can't say the word."
I said the h-word a few times last book. It was my first swear word (Damn doesn't count. Actually, does the h-word even count as a swear word?), so I guess you could call it special, but, like, even so... I STILL CAN'T SAY IT CONSISTENTLY
I'm scared of saying swear words. Don't worry, I'll recover over time, but for now, I'm still worried that my mom's gonna hear me cussing, and... I dunno, send me to my room. Hmm. I didn't get a lot of bad punishments.
Nonetheless, I was having trouble on what to say. Thankfully, no one was around to hear my rambling, because I was alone. Purposefully- so I could think, not because I have no friends. C'mon, that was a recurring joke LAST book, this is a new book, I need new jokes now! Like... uh... yo mama... okay, I give up.
Wait, wait, wait, I just had an idea regarding the first encounter problem I was having. Why don't I do something to follow up? Like, ask a question, I don't know. Hmm. While I was thinking of a question to ask I arrived at my secluded location, the computer lab. What was I doing there?
I dunno. I asked to be there during snack, and I was allowed to go here. Something about being near the computers was just... so cool, I guess. I really like them.
This is foreshadowing, by the way.
So.. I was in the computer lab and I was just sitting there, doing nothing, trying to come up with an idea until I got a different idea.
A non-Caitlyn related. Were you assuming that I'm always thinking about her? I'm not creepy.
Remember when we were making that book of the Elementals? And how I wanted to be the main character and no one listened? Well... Ha! I'll show them. They made tons of mistakes when writing, but now that I'm in charge, I can do what I want. I'll make myself the main character, and I'll make the book a much better book! That's right, I'm making a new book!
And I did. I started writing the book and decided it would be describing the backstory of my character. (The name of the book is Wet, btw. That's why- that's why the name of this chapter is 'Wet'. Not because anything... sexual... happens in this chapter. Elementary school kids, remember?)
So, in the original Elementals book, the way my character (Percy) was introduced was: I was just sitting in the middle of the forest. The book didn't explain why I was there or what I was doing, and I just randomly joined the group. So I wanted to explain why I was there and started writing the backstory of my character. You may be asking: Was it a good book?
Of course it wasn't! It was written by a 5th grader! But that wasn't the point, no no no, it was to prove I was a much better writer. And I think I am. Here, you can read it here:
Sorry, not sorry.
So I finished writing (like a... 30 page google doc with size 24 font), and I was ready to show it off. To who?
Oh, my god. I'm a genius. I'd show it off to Caitlyn. That's what I could follow up with after apologiz... ing... right, I still have to do that. Whatever, now I'm excited to talk to her! Wait, don't take that wrong, I just meant I was now happy that I could show someone my awesome book. Yeah, after she accepts my apology, she'll obviously want to read my book! Yeah, I'm a genius!
But I'd still have to do the whole apologizing thing. How should I pull of such a task?
I know, I'll just walk up and call Caitlyn some dumb nickname. That's a great plan!
It's not a great plan. I've gotta be quick, lunch is just about to start!
Lunch started. Saw Caitlyn. Did nothing.
Recess started. Saw Caitlyn. Did not-
"You gonna talk to her?"
Anna ran up to me as soon as recess started.
"Yeah, duh, but, where is she?"
"uh what do you mean youre staring at her"
Anna was looking at where my eyes were directed, and I was, as I just found out. Staring straight at Caitlyn. Uh. Whoops.
"I- uh- no- dang it. I guess I'll go talk to her...?"
"You should, Becky."
Beck- oh, my god. I thought you would have- there's no way. Why haven't you grown out of calling me that by now? It's been like a year! Just stop calling me that!
Spoiler: They won't.
Ahem, I stood up from the loner curb I was sitting on and walked over to where Caitlyn was sitting down. Okay. First time talking to her in a while. Phew, I should be okay. Just... talk to her. Don't forget to say anything important. Say everything you need to say. Just talk to her. Just like normal. Yeah, perfectly fine, perfectly natural, perfectly normal.
"HeAIUh-"
Heh. Hehe. Hehehe-I VOICECRACKED. Of course. As soon as I try to talk to her, I screw up on the first word. Great job, me. Real great job. I'm gonna go run away and cry aga-
"Wait- Becky!"
NOT HER TOO
"Ahem, ahem- yeah, it's me, what's up?"
As I said it was me, I made finger guns at her, and waited for her to make them back at me. She didn't do it back. Ouch.
"You were talking to me, what is it?"
"I just... wanted to say hi."
And I wanted to promote my book, of course. That's the only other thing. I think. I don't remember my script.
"Okay?"
"Yeah. Uh, hi. I think."
Hmm. I sound kinda dumb right now. I'm not nervous, am I?
"You think?"
"I don't know. I-I'm gonna go."
"Wait, wait, no, you're not leaving. Is there something else you wanted from me?"
I guess I'm not leaving.
"I- yeah, I guess there was something I wanted to say."
"What is it?"
"I'm... writing a book- it's the origin of Percy, you know, the water me, from the Elementa- never mind."
"O...kay? Cool, I don't really c- is that it?"
"Uh, yeah?"
She... said she didn't care about my book? That's so rude! Whatever. But... I did notice that the way she talked... it sounded like she wanted something from me. What, a stuffed bird? I already tried that with someone else! And let me tell you, it did not go well. What, you already knew about that? Pfft, who cares? What do you mean, I forgot to say something to her? I'm a man of skill, I never forget anything!
"You sure there's nothing else you wanted to tell me?"
"Yeah... I think so?"
I don't get it. It's like she wants me to say something to her, something super important that I haven't done that I should probably do, and I have no clue what it could be.
Don't tell me what it is. I'm sure I'll remember whatever I apparently so needily am supposed to remember before the end of this year. If I don't then... well, that sucks for you, and will probably suck for me. Or, of course, I could just completely not care (which I don't)
You're saying I talked about what I was supposed to remember about 30ish paragraphs ago? I don't ever re-read these books, how am I supposed to know what I was talking about that long ago? I don't feel like going back and finding it out. So, uh, screw you. I've now completely forgotten what I needed to do. And... it's your fault. Yeah, yeah, it's always the reader's fault! That's what people say, right? Oh, that's about customers and waiters? Uh, okay, I didn't ask?
"Well... I'm gonna go."
Right, I'm still talking to Caitlyn.
"Alright, fine. Go."
She sounded kinda... mad. Eh. Her problem.
"Okay..."
Huh. Neat. I just left right after that.
...Yeah. I'm really just going to end the chapter like that. Like I said, I'm pretty much cooler than you, so I get to decide things around here. Sorry, not sorry, but screw you. Oh, I should say something, too. Uh... screw Caitlyn, too.
Yeah. Screw her. And Anna. Screw girls. Er, not like that. You know what I mean.207Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2KAkCyZbBO
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