Dear,
I don’t really know what I’m feeling anymore.
Sometimes, I tell myself that I’m okay, that I’ve accepted everything, that we’re better this way—as friends. And yet, here I am, still waiting for your reply, still wondering if you’re thinking of me too. You’re still in my head; No matter how much I try to keep myself busy, no matter how many times I tell myself that I’ve moved on, somehow, you always find your way back into my thoughts.
I don’t know if I’ve truly stopped feeling something for you, or if I’m just choosing to ignore it—because I know there’s nowhere for this love to go. Maybe I keep it quiet because I don’t want to ruin the friendship we’re trying so hard to fix. Or maybe, I’m scared that if I acknowledge what I truly feel, I’ll end up hurting again.
I’ve always believed that love---real love---doesn’t ask for anything in return. And I still believe that. That’s why I never demanded anything from you, never forced you to love me back. I just wanted to be someone you could count on. Someone who understands you. Someone who stays.
But sometimes, staying hurts, too.
Still… I’m here. Still hoping. Still holding on, even just to the thought of “us” being okay.
And maybe that’s enough—for now.
40Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh9ZHzMpQZy
-WhispersAt12AM
Originally written on May 1st, 2025.
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