A/N: A somewhat tongue-in-cheek skit as you can probably tell from the title, but this was plenty of fun to write. Maybe I'll return to properly finish it one day. 928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7F8zSGIal7
-:-928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1Nrt1ScA6L
THE TYPICAL GOTHIC VICTORIAN MELODRAMA, ONLY GAYER AND LESS WHITE928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBDoqP4svvy
CHARACTERS928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOa7IwuPlIC
CECIL - male, twenties, biracial, well-dressed928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5V8R6ylKzr
XIUYING - female, twenties, Chinese, no-nonsense; a suffragette928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb2ycrbIgsp
--928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHmOiej01A8
EXT. GARDEN BENCH, NIGHT928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6giT3hKr5Y
Early twentieth century. CECIL sits, head in his hands, as XIUYING studies a handwritten letter with furrowed brows. She carefully folds it back up and turns to CECIL.928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDXnycJI4NG
XIUYING928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTkLiJbd93k
We don’t have much time.928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6PACohpJCx
CECIL
I’m surprised we have any time left at all! It only came in the post this morning. What the hell am I going to do?928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFbGS07g6m4
XIUYING928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX6sbrwSYDr
First, you need to calm down so we can consider the situation. 928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcNjHdR5Z1M
CECIL928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUkpZJhQRPa
Calm? Calm? How can you expect me to stay calm after that? My lover is blackmailing me over poetry - explicit poetry that I sent him! He expects a thousand pounds by tonight, or else I’m in for ruin and two years hard labour!928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyagoSgWDM8
XIUYING928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuj2JTPmb44
I understand you’re upset - 928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWOs1NUZkl4
CECIL928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgr2inYKxqZ
I damn well am! 928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡESPosBohN0
XIUYING928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWuwjmv76C0
- but panicking will get nothing done. I am so sorry this happened, Cecil, and… I’m so sorry about Laurence.928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYjMOT8EB8x
CECIL, stricken anew, breaks down. 928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzvqsP6J0Ny
CECIL928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmKtXT6EuBl
Dear God, I trusted him. The first person I ever trusted with my love, and he betrayed me. I didn’t know he had it in him. We were all so careful. There was no possible chance of discovery. The three of us were the only ones who knew. I don’t understand why he could do this. 928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYqhL7SuUie
XIUYING928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLICdAI5H4D
(slowly)928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoWCHgGuDvC
As a matter of fact, I highly doubt it was him at all.928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTbs86UsaAK
CECIL freezes and looks up at her. 928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCKkuXYx3Rk
CECIL928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLg1uGgowjH
What?928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡci44GzBwv4
XIUYING928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbwpMCXhuRW
I cannot in good conscience believe that Laurence is behind this.928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFKSr7fZ17z
CECIL928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHjqeOn7f89
Xiuying, what on earth are you talking about? This is Laurence’s handwriting. This is the very ink and paper he uses to write his plays! (He gets angry.) Do you think I haven’t considered the possibility that the love of my life couldn’t be blackmailing me like this? This is undeniably him!928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXQRFP38R5m
XIUYING928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYNdj2O7IoX
Yes, but if you had taken the time to read over this thoroughly, you would notice that his handwriting is wobbly.928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlF8MvJexug
CECIL928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLsfEPz4TWH
It’s always wobbly. Messy handwriting is the staple of any artist.928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEDb6GzvdCF
XIUYING928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDZHZJXU8Ga
Messier than usual, I mean. You two may be lovers, but I’m the one who’s known him since grammar school. He only ever writes like this when he’s upset or under exceptional stress.928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMlzAWYpPm7
CECIL928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgMcqo6gXki
Well, maybe he was nervous, pulling the rug out from under someone who trusted him. 928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfdqhNJHtU8
XIUYING928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCkAh0Qn2qw
That may be the case, but look at this.928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlw8su2TxvF
She points at several dark brown and rust-coloured stains at the edges of the paper. There are ink blotches everywhere, but these particular spots, upon close inspection, are distinctive. 928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFo3orDkTd1
XIUYING928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk1FvS7gESq
If I’m not mistaken, that is blood.928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfaYKjToaer
CECIL928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQWjFveiRFe
Blood? (A pause as horrified realization creeps in.) Oh, dear God. Laurence.928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXw6AHiMZoZ
XIUYING928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPsoUClT6Dq
(grimly)928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgngovEQVVr
Exactly. There’s something deeper here, far worse than what’s on the surface. 928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1zsjZqReZQ
CECIL928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOXFMZZRyie
But - but if someone is forcing Laurence to write this, then how - how can we get him back? I don’t own a thousand pounds. I couldn’t possibly pay this person off.928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbXYHqqcw4B
CECIL is shocked to turn and see XIUYING smiling faintly. 928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7p5sC9CsTT
XIUYING928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrrRaBW3zYd
Who said anything about paying them off?928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRuVfzAB5tM
--928Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkewXXwW3sV
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