Sarah stepped out of the car, pushed her red knitted scarf close to her neck as she walked inside the skyscraper. She didn't bother to check which of the countless floors her husband's office because she knew the one it was on by heart. Taking the elevator up to the tenth floor, her mind wandered to what she would say to Chris. Throughout the five years they've been married, so much has happened. From her assault and then losing their child. Then they moved from a small town to a big city. They've always stuck together but she was scared of what would happen once she spoke to him.
The elevator doors opened and Sarah stepped out and walked to her husband's office. Etched on the door read Renewed and Restored Counseling Services and below read her husband's name with his abbreviated degree as well as other colleagues who worked with him. As she opened the door a soft yellow light illuminated the room and the smell of lavender filled the air. Sarah approached the desk where Jane sat typing on the computer.
Glancing up from the computer Jane said with a smile, "Hi how can I-" Jane paused for a moment before she realized it was Sarah. "I'm sorry. Hi Mrs. Matthews."
"Remember Jane you can stop with the formalities. Call me Sarah."
"Alright, Sarah." Jane turned her chair and body so she was completely facing her. "What can I help you with?"
"Is my husband here?"
"Yes, he is. He's with a client, but the session should be over soon. I can get him for you." Jane said beginning to stand up.
"No, no it's okay. I'll wait."
"I'm heading to the break room to get coffee. Do you want some?"
"A bottle of water if you don't mind."
"I don't mind. I'll be right back."
As Jane left the room, Sarah sat in a chair at the corner of the office. She read a few of the inspirational and motivational quotes that were encased in a frame against one of the walls. She fiddled with a loose strand of fabric on her coat as she thought that the only thing she was motivated to do was have this conversation with her husband, then go back home and straight to bed. Sarah looked up as she heard her husband's voice radiating down the hall, "Yeah don't forget what you wrote down."
Chris looked over to where Sarah was and was surprised to see her there. Chris talked to his client for a few moments longer as Jane handed Sarah a bottle of water then returned back to her desk.
"Schedule when you can Mrs. Jones," Chris said with a smile then closed the door behind her, then walked over to Sarah. "What are you doing here? Is everything okay?"
"Umm..." Sarah said putting her hands in her coat pockets, "Do you have some free time to talk?"
"Yeah, my next client isn't scheduled for another hour and a half."
"Okay. Thanks."
Sarah barely held Chris's hand as she followed him into his personal office where he would meet with clients. The walls were painted a deep purple with light gray trimming. "What do you think? The painter stopped by last week. My clients love it."
"It's interesting," Sarah said a little above a whisper.
"You don't seem okay," Chris said leading Sarah to one of the chairs in his office.
"I went to see Dr. Waterstein today and-"
"You're not obligated to tell me anything."
"I know. Something we discussed I wanted to talk to you about right away."
"What is it?"
"Well..." Sarah looked down at the carpeted floor as she traced its pattern with her foot. She looked up at Chris with tears sparkling in her eyes, "I wanted to ask you a question. Why are you so controlling?" She was surprised when Chris turned his back to her and he looked out of the window in his office. She was stunned by the silence that filled the room and echoed off the walls. Sarah couldn't remember a time when her husband was a speechless as this.
"What made you ask that?" You know I would never-" Chris couldn't finish the rest of his sentence.
"Well, Dr. Waterstein asked me why I wasn't talking to you about what I've been feeling. I told him you are so supportive of me and you truly are. I love you so much for that. I don't want you analyzing me and you're always asking me if I'm okay. And watching my every move."
"What do you want me to do? Ignore you?" Chris shouted.
"I don't need you to ask me if I'm okay. I'm fine." Sarah stood quickly, ignoring the wave of dizziness that came over her.
"I don't understand why you won't talk to me," Chris said lowering his voice and turning to face Sarah.
"You want everything back to the way it was before I was assaulted."
"Of course I want some kind of normalcy back. I know things won't go back to the way they once were. If it seems like I'm controlling, I'm sorry I really am. I'm worried about you."
"I can't even make my own decisions." Sarah raked her hand through her hair as she continued, "I mean you called the detectives to get a protective detail on me. I can take care of myself."
"Sarah that man who assaulted you is on the loose somewhere in Philadelphia." Chris paced around the room and continued, "Someone is taking photos of us. While we're out in public and in our intimate moments. And you're angry about me wanting to find a way to protect you?"
"You could have asked me first. I'm not a child, you don't need to make decisions for me." Sarah grabbed her purse and headed for the door which led to the main lobby.
"Where are you going?" Chris said holding onto Sarah's wrist a little too tight.
"Wouldn't you like to know? I'm going to David's, I'm not sure how long I'll be gone."
"Can't we talk more about this?"
"Later, now let me go!"
Chris didn't release his grip on Sarah's wrist and said: "Talk to me!"
Sarah was shocked when her hand went from holding the end of her scarf to then sharply connecting to Chris's cheek. She couldn't believe she hit her husband, but at that moment she didn't care. She ignored the mixture of mascara and tears running down her face. She didn't care who else heard their heated conversation. Chris let go of Sarah's wrist as she walked out of his office and made it to Jake's car.
"Oh my gosh, what happened?" Jake said as he started the car and blasted the heat.
"Jake...can you take me home. I want to grab a few things then head over to David's?"
"Sure."
When Sarah arrived back to her apartment she packed a few items including her laptop and notes for her book. Picking up a sticky note from her desk, Sarah wrote a quick note which read "Chris, I'm sorry and I love you." Signing her name she stuck it to the kitchen counter where she knew he would see it. Sarah then turned off the lights, grabbed her duffel bag and drove with Jake to David's home.
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