Nice try.i like your storyline and idea. But for me if you explain with more detail on how they die and killed by the ghost this story would be on anothet level😉. Overall yes your story was great.keep writing dude.all the best
@Angelickhan, You are
an awesome writer!.This was my first time reading a book by you and I found
this book well written and I enjoyed Your style, descriptive details, and story
plot just blows my mind I’m going to finish all stories in your book #peace #spreadlove #happyreading #positivity #angelic
#loveyourself✔
I can understand your concerns of copyright infringement but I feel like starting your story off with such is offputting. I commend your efforts and do have a couple of tips. First, don't capitalize your names completely. I wasnt entirely sure why that was like that and it was a bit distracting. Second, try to develop a sense of flow. Your sentences were a bit choppy. Third, try to throw some detail in there. You gave the setting a bit of a backstory but it seemed a bit rushed with the short sentences. Also the sudden death of one character. It just happened suddenly which is fine for ahock factor but i dont recall how they perished. This comment is to better your writing in the future so please do not stop posting your works and i wish you the best!
But for me if you explain with more detail on how they die and killed by the ghost this story would be on anothet level😉.
Overall yes your story was great.keep writing dude.all the best
an awesome writer!.This was my first time reading a book by you and I found
this book well written and I enjoyed Your style, descriptive details, and story
plot just blows my mind I’m going to finish all stories in your book #peace #spreadlove #happyreading #positivity #angelic
#loveyourself ✔
¡
This comment is to better your writing in the future so please do not stop posting your works and i wish you the best!
-TnY