Faces we never saw - Chapter 2: Condition

Wednesday, afternoon. After class.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCX7BL0mA33
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Unfamiliar…96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMTIQBLCae5
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I was walking on a street that was unfamiliar to me. Glancing at the unfamiliar faces who walked past me. Looking at the unfamiliar houses as I passed by them. Shuffling my feet over the unfamiliar concrete towards an unfamiliar destination I didn’t want to reach but had to.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH8P2yqDcys
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Going to meet an unfamiliar boy who made an unfamiliar request.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzWx6rn83Be
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… and an unknown condition.

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What am I doing? I thought for the last time. I hoped it was the last time.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuRtQxrEaAO
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Why did I come here? I tilted my face up toward the sky, hoping that from all that blue there was something in it that would tell me the answer. There was none. There were only the clouds drifting slowly, like they were matching how I moved my feet.

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But underneath those questions, there was a quiet persistence that would talk to me.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiUEVfHLjK0
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There is hope. All I have to do is hear what he has to say. Then I go home.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9RpUEjxyWq
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Were they convincing? Enough... probably.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJOePtyCbQo
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I sighed and kept moving.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5SSZYpD5HM
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I recalled what happened this morning. It was difficult. A different type of difficult.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyMyFfElMFx
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I’d sat in my seat before first period and looked around at everyone. I tried to find the expressions I was wearing on the faces of my friends.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKaRLEXBdZ1
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Hina was at her desk, clean and composed like she always was. Her eyes gazed towards the windows. Whatever she was thinking, it was only for her alone. And I never wondered what it was until that time.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJpHTT2KKE4
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A few seconds later, I found Yui standing in front of Mika’s desk. Her expression cycled through different emotions during their conversation. She was probably talking about stories she had heard a few days ago. And Mika was more animated than yesterday. Reacting to Yui’s story the way she was supposed to. But I knew she was only trying. I knew yesterday hadn’t left her. I could see it in the moments between her reactions, a few fractions of a second where she would lose control.

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My eyes started to move without me noticing. Toward the windows. Toward the back.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI78Vfyqdff
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And there he was. Completely unbothered. Absorbed by his book, entirely isolated from the noises the classroom had contained before homeroom. I didn’t even know if he noticed the empty space around him. Nobody talked to him. Nobody paid attention to him.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡokTb0498Uw
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Except me, right at that moment.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjAyU1aIEg4
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I looked away before anyone caught me. I sighed.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO9zU10bazw
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Everyone seemed to have moved on from what happened yesterday afternoon. In this same classroom, in that heavy atmosphere. Or maybe they were doing a better job pretending they were.

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...Better than me, at least.

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Since...

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I was the one who had to walk to a near-stranger’s apartment after school. I was the one who had to prepare to hear a condition that no one knew yet. And I was the one who had to steady my face, to hide everything that I was thinking... So that my friends wouldn’t worry.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdMGzUWHkT1
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I tried to keep it up all day. And I was very tired.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDqC3Sojgot
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A few times during the walk, I stopped. I turned halfway back, contemplated for a few seconds, wondered what I had been asking myself since I arrived at the station. But I always turned forward... Turned forward and kept walking.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7AP68E6l4y
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He’s a person, I thought. I needed it. I needed to remind myself what I had rehearsed ever since I woke up this morning. He’s a human being. He’s a student, not a criminal. He looked intimidating. But when we talked to him, he was never violent... 96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzD2QStiwcE
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Then...96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6GwLyZNnlR
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Also, why was he unusually slow? It was very nerve wracking watching him move from one place to another while the room sat in such a tense mood. And he profiled my friends one by one, like he knew everything about them and where they rank in school, he probably knew the scores they even got, and he was right but…96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWTyoffT9wg
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I paused.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4sKK07p2PM
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Well... That was actually a bit creepy. Who even does that?96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeP2K2cctiY
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My thoughts suddenly went in another direction…96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLZ4GfRNmlr
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What about his condition?96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmkfpzvXnQj
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I shook my head. I needed to. Positive thoughts. Positive thoughts only.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2JwnfgsFrf
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Instead, my mind tried to embrace quiet.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNW54gLjmf2
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…96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3qlZ478PfP
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…96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDMrj3M9cCB
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… condition.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡELxTXMBzJ4
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I gave up.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbuZUnynWWa
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The sight of the apartment he wanted me to go to finally came into view. A few more minutes of walking and I found myself standing below it. I looked up. Ten floors. It looked expensive. But maybe not. It was quite fancy, though. A little bit, but enough that it made the houses around it look small and a little embarrassed by comparison. It had solid walls, gray. They were so thick that I imagined if I went inside and screamed, nobody from the outside would hear it.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡODgNjVkwBG
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… That last thought wasn’t necessary.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6vWxrAw9Y8
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I walked to the front entrance.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3P18nmmkms
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The door was glass, sturdy and clear, and beyond it I could see a second door of the same material. I stepped forward, the outer door opened automatically, and I went inside.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj38sOwpPbd
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I stood there for a second.

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This didn’t look the same as Hina’s apartment. I mean, I had known it since I saw the building from the outside. But I wasn’t sure how to proceed.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQV89ykP2sJ
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Wait… dramas…96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2JoJoPAftv
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If I remembered correctly. There was supposed to be an intercom panel around here somewhere. And it was probably that one, left side beside the door.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqgU0iO5K2u
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I opened the note he gave me and approached the panel. I wasn’t sure at first since there were two panels in front of me. One seemed to look like where key cards go through. Maybe this one with a keypad.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMdXaNDKdqf
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“Room number 502,” I said while I typed the numbers on it.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡroCZ0AVtPi
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I stared at the panel while I waited.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ00ACmmtfTq
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“Who?” A voice came through the speaker, flat and immediate.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbAhdo8tgEU
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“I-It’s me, Miyase Runa. I came here to talk about…”

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“Proceed.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFDqS7OiURJ
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The inner door opened before I finished what I wanted to say.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQsgUTot6nY
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Right. Of course.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOIcsTXCkHo
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I walked inside. There was a reception desk but no one was behind it.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVrzYD9ikgf
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He’s a person. He’s a human being. He’s just a student.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6f5m02qCH1
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I told myself repeatedly all the way to the elevator. I told myself repeatedly while the elevator moved. By the time the doors opened on the fifth floor. I had told myself it enough times that it had stopped sounding like words and started sounding like a sound I was making with my mouth.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMMGZOH4alN
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I reached one of the apartment doors then checked the note he gave me one last time.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy2tRPnzJOp
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Fifth floor. Room 502.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx9VTXOFQ2L
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I took a breath.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsGIRbEH2cn
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Took another one.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHJ6lIqYer5
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And knocked twice.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRCpQcGwHZY
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A few seconds later. The door opened.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgBLQFJAa9A
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I gripped my bag.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡII25vXY6lX
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I looked at him.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYvF3lwEzI3
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“You could’ve used the doorbell,” he said.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9lyaI5krE1
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Hmm?

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I looked to the left of the door frame.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2RqkcygLYd
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There it was. Right there. A doorbell, where doorbells had always been, in the place that doorbells had always existed, on every door I had ever encountered in my entire life.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeaiI5iFJVM
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My face went warm. I tried to hide it.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXGFVP9s5lv
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“I… didn’t see it,” I said, because it was the only sentence I could locate in my head at that moment. It didn’t sound convincing, in fact, it didn’t convince me at all. Because there was no way I could have missed it. Maybe because I had not thought anything about doorbells for the past day. Maybe because I had been thinking more about what happened yesterday and what was going to happen today. And now I was standing here having knocked on a door like someone who had never encountered doors with a doorbell before.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv0xuUM9lxz
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He’s definitely reconsidering everything.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyofqGGODpR
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“Come in,” he said, after looking at me for a moment that felt longer than it was.

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I took off my shoes and arranged them neatly by the entrance.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7M1GzuDu2w
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“Excuse me for intruding,” I said, bowing slightly.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYAIEX0UpzX
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I stepped inside.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMy0k3B8dSt
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He led me to the living room.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡenAEEshSHe
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I stopped just inside the doorway and looked around without meaning to.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL6Va7ly8X6
It was clean. It wasn’t empty but felt like it was since there were no unnecessary decorations inside. There were two sofas, one smaller facing the flat screen TV in the corner, and one longer that faced the door of the living room, perpendicular to the smaller one. And in the center was just a carpet. There were no tables, no cabinets, no photographs on the walls. Nothing else.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm2u2jN4VpI
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To the right was the kitchen connected to the living room with no walls between them. And just as much as the living room, I only saw what seemed to be the necessary utensils that he needed. Or so I assumed.

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It kinda fits him, actually.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9Irmie8F31
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I thought about it for a second.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ74jfH8avOn
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“Sit anywhere you like,” he said.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡskWrrWbUeF
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I considered the longer sofa and the smaller sofa for a second. I started walking towards the longer sofa, I sat at the other end near the smaller sofa, which put the most distance between me and the other end of the room. As I settled in I noticed a book sitting on the opposite end of where I sat. I leaned slightly, curious to what it was.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2h5WolKaMS
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English. The cover was entirely in English.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqbUvp0dZtm
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“Do you want water?”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC9luAUBiWU
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I straightened up. His voice came from the kitchen and it caught me off guard since I felt like I was intruding someone’s private life when I leaned towards the book. His voice is always serious, it wasn’t cold but it was different, like the strict kind of different, or maybe leaned more towards indifference? I didn’t know, I was just startled. I wondered if he was aware of how he sounded to others? Probably not.

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“There’s soda in the fridge too. Which one?”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8884EPGSll
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“Soda please,” I answered before I finished deciding. I meant to say water. I didn’t know why I said soda.

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He came back a few minutes later with a glass of soda with little ice cubes. He handed it to me.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa64SyX2VAE
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“Thank you.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA4bqYrdXMV
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He went back to the kitchen. I watched him go, wondering what he had planned to do. I noticed he was going towards a small wooden table at the corner of the kitchen before he started carrying it. Then walked back to the living room and carefully set it down over the carpet between the two sofas.

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It was a low kind of table, made for sitting on the floor to write.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKFOLFPjLFx
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“You can put your drink here.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5bhUY4h7du
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“Thank you.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNOmSsx0E2S
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He walked around the table he just placed. He ended up in the other end of the longer sofa, picked up the book that was there, and sat down.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIRkutkT593
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And opened it.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmWfJlI1ZZl
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And started reading…96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlNUAlodrov
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Started reading…96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtWg9xNkVdw
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I tried to confirm what just happened. I came all the way here. Ten minutes of train ride, fifteen minutes walking from the station to this apartment, I had failed to locate a doorbell that had been directly beside the door, and now this. I thought we were going to start talking about what he told me yesterday. Instead, he started reading.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh66mrwJIWo
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“Um.” I tried.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡixVH6eoWfq
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He turned a page.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqBhiCScr0F
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“About what we discussed yesterday…”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLaWNaPXYFT
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Nothing.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHbVKUQ3lzP
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“…Never mind.” I let out a laugh. It sounded awkward. I immediately regretted the laugh.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6Vuyf5WLc1
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I looked at the soda. The ice was already starting to melt at the edges. I took a sip. Looked up at the ceiling for reasons I couldn’t explain. There was nothing interesting about the ceiling. It was a ceiling.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡchkiR4C3Ab
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I decided to search inside my bag instead. The only things that I found were textbooks, notebooks and my test papers that put me in this situation. I cursed at them. In spirit.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8NGQYkObzS
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My phone buzzed inside my pocket. I opened it. There were notifications that Mika and Yui had messaged me privately. Once from Mika, five times from Yui. There was also a flood of notifications that came from our group chat. It didn’t say who made those fifteen notifications, but I am totally sure it was Yui.

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I didn’t have the mood to reply yet. So I opened an app, found a video, maybe just watch for a little bit. Made myself look busy just like him.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVhb2bFlhNS
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Ten minutes passed.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuxjrlilvuO
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I put down my phone.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtCYvvloUIw
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“Hello?” I looked at him directly this time.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR3lmChFkWG
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Everything that I was thinking before coming here and everything I heard about him both were gone in that moment. I didn’t come here to sit in silence and watch videos.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsXMXcBLI83
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrWxYqLmwsr
If he still didn’t answer me this time, I was leaving.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBuq7V87HQB
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9UHYhrs98K
My eyebrows pulled together.

He slowly looked up.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3gmHNSNil1
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHAtbCXivMk
“Are you done with your drink?” he asked.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFMcQGGIHvE
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5hq2K1unby
My eye twitched.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPShaR193S9
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj0EpKsPqYl
I wasn’t DONE with my drink, thank you. I was DONE waiting here for nothing. If you still make me wait for one second more and waste all that effort and all those worries I had been carrying on my way here, THEN I AM LEAVING.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsN24RtDfFA
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWffNzqDXab
I thought… they came out good in my thoughts…96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdQ5nNQzzpR
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfcjVptAB2W
I sighed for a bit, tried to compose myself. Okay now he is paying attention to me.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsXn4QIrfMc
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYDwWV8c6HY
“Yes,” I replied. My voice still had an edge to it that I didn’t bother smoothing out. “Thank you.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ5rn43OCQn
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqkLFBSl8fZ
“Follow me.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4n0uZSrZ28
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeSiOucpajG
He stood up.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpdytft5uQa
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDKdUfbl7dv
I took a breath. Smoothed my expression back into something neutral. It took a moment. Afterwards, I stood up and followed.

96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBhv4hO3bYC

He led me back out to the hallway. Two doors on the right from the living room. We passed the first one and stopped at the second, closer to the main entrance. He opened it.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡicflrKgeyt
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ7PII6vu45
I looked inside.

96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi1oBMdpfB3

The room was the complete opposite of the living room.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ62dLwsZQol
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡibdyxML64X
An electric piano against one wall, a guitar on a stand, and something that looked like a smaller, plastic version of the piano with little buttons and dials I didn’t recognize, plugged into a computer setup near the window.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbTL3JtfINl
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO7ozY5uORW
One computer, but with three monitors lined up side by side, all three still on.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTdIXPQKzz1
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaeA577XnJe
The middle one had lines of text. They were small, colorful, structured in a way that reminded me of what the programmer characters in dramas were working on when emphasized. Except this looked real. Less glamorous. Just a wall of text that I didn’t know what it meant.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYk3iKXoWwu
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYAHlM2yYdW
The screen on the left had a bunch of horizontal bars in different colors, all squiggly and uneven, kind of like one of those heart monitor lines from medical dramas but way more of them, stacked on top of each other, with little boxes and tiny switches everywhere.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN78GIee5gB
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2msPijBaJ5
And the one on the right. Drawing? Just the outline of someone’s head, unfinished, floating in the middle of a mostly empty white background. No face yet. Just the shape.

96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuahHXhv0ad

My eyes moved away from the screens, taking in the rest of the room.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA8soiCfU3b
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMUFwkEtJ8b
A drawing tablet. Papers stacked on a separate table, some of them weighted down with pencils, some of them half-finished with marks I couldn’t fully read from here. Notebooks. Drawing pads. Crumpled paper on the floor near the waste bin. Probably were thrown but didn’t quite make it. A lot of them were not even close to the waste bin. Rulers, erasers, pencils that had been used and not put back.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi6fX2Z3OgV
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXVRR5hXREE
It was a mess. It was surprisingly chaotic and messy.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQikmCFds6R
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSzpYDi6u6h
I thought the living room fit him well because of how he moves and how he talks. Both with a certain precision.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDlidhmMn5X
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwy7pI0k7x4
But this…96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL0J6vi01du
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmk68xPHGmG
This explains the dark below his eyes.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE1gOXkFqA8
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrYmkHuvqFL
This explains the messy hair.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQgRGBmUPLT
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN9hjeC6CMa
And I could totally picture him in here. Staying up late, scratching his head leaving his hair a mess. This room gave me everything the living room didn’t. I could guess exactly where he spent his time, what he put his hours into, what he cared about. Without him saying a single word about it.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaKGdqZG4L9
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjqasuqZeCI
I forgot to breathe. So I did.

96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0TcrVURj7c

“Are you…” I searched for the right question. “A musician?”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvTssiqHl6p
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzBZXCZNxcI
“No,” he said. “I just bought those, I’m still learning.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTFglWdEHGS
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz9bhG9Yo4X
“All of them? The piano, the guitar, and…” I gestured vaguely at the plastic thing with the buttons.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhkCIaUFxMh
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx5Qi6NVTRI
“That’s a MIDI keyboard. I am currently trying to make music for my game.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHqxTlhgQrD
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmmDKGrvFwM
“What about the drawings?”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNGedGbiQaq
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw4GxN3Y4tH
“Also learning.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvcm1Arfrs1
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqK230GWLvG
“Are you making a manga?”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuDl9wkoiLW
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXLrYsbpnHQ
“No. Just drawing for my game.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOvrN2v8AHe
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTFREDRWsPi
“And the computer? The colored texts?”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDAiYkbMFkQ
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMV9X3rjQQp
“Those are programs.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwK0SMsehlX
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy26ZBGiLXm
“For making a game?”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡViv4cgFu4H
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhsww69hHzW
“Yes.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrQh0Z8n0m6
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGCPDVdAdni
“Isn’t that… aren’t you amazing?”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZlWpw7HoAM
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp54bYgzb52
“Not really. I know how to code now. I still don’t know how to draw or make music.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLfrKcd91Q3
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv76ZkAOLii
But isn’t he still amazing?96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTjt74c1feP
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNvWM56A2Kj
I looked at the three screens again. And that reinforced my thought. The lines of text, the squiggly bars, the half-finished head all just sat there. All equally impressed me.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF8PXC33T5U
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA8LKSjhoWd
I opened my mouth but I didn’t know what I could say. The questions just ran in my head and they kept overlapping each other. And on top of that, some part of me felt like I was already prying just by standing here looking at all of it.

96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkn62I3OPdi

“How are you finding time to learn all of this?” I asked finally.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH7Dd1p6tkH
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTVX3FX7e1G
“I have a schedule.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmCPHTzYVrG
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvEIptzxXz4
Of course. But still…96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZM0P8fbENd
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5vz7MR0vuG
“Since when did you start?”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMjIV9IOUCx
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡop8Y5ir77C
“I started learning how to program since I was ten. Started making a game when I was thirteen. Started learning guitar when I was fourteen. Started learning how to draw last year. Started learning…”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjoRKbonqvH
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN721It1LDS
“Wait, okay I get it.” If I hadn’t stopped him there, I had a feeling he would list everything. And I had a feeling there was more than what I was seeing today. “So did you finish making a game?”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzrwzMkL2ww
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdV2BrvxEFk
“I posted one online last year. Free. It was the one I’d been building since I started.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDDOB16d1qL
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ4ET9dTtZ8
“How did it go?”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3yNwNzBngu
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzYAyGTwHU7
“Around two thousand downloads, last time I checked.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSv8rKeAFl1
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD0G8wIG3Bv
Two thousand? Downloads? That many!?96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCl9eho9tHM
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmovJ8kUFBi
I couldn’t even get a hundred views for that one dance video Yui and me posted when we were still in middle school. Isn’t two thousand like really good?96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1dh3u8Js2o
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzJdTv00H9D
“But that’s beside the point,” he said when I was about to say my thoughts. “Let’s go back to the living room. Let’s talk there.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡExf9SM3hWl
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHjHWbFRvs4
As soon as he said that, reality snapped me back to the reason why I was here.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAbpIpFEkyh
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSQEt9KtiUW
He closed the door then started leading me back to the living room.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWTrjL376Jb
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0VmN6rgAGX
My eyes couldn’t resist glancing for that room one last time.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbZn6UKVQNJ
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ33DKSTKmTk
I could never do that. I thought. And I meant it entirely without self-pity. It was the scale of it. This kind of sustained, quiet, solitary commitment to something was not something I had ever managed. Maybe that was part of why I was here.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGQhMZMd3zP
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlubMqZRjPu
We entered the living room and I sat down where I’d been before. He took his end of the sofa. And for some reason, the room felt smaller. It wasn’t uncomfortable, it was just different. Like I was seeing it properly now instead of through a filter of nerves.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwtQts3L6NY
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLRwyYisGDI
“So,” I said. I knew what we were going to talk about now. I felt ready. “What is it?”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbBgn3OgS85
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVKqPp6hkgX
“If I do this,” he started, “I’ll have to set aside all of that.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPIYEIPDZtm
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4yanJs7V9k
My eyes widened a little. I didn’t consider that.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwPg6SjL71c
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVQUMHMHY8C
“My part-time job. I’ll have to quit it.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjKdqCJPSD9
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYA193NLk25
He has one? I had no idea.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgNaBriwEXw
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF0MbpSrbvV
“All the time I would spend learning to draw, learning to play music and making games. All of them will get reduced. As well as the time I have for my own studying.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWrfGH7lWOK
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKfN9ytOnyH
I wanted to cover my face with both my hands. I felt confident opening the conversation as soon as we got back to the living room. Now, I was feeling the weight of all the things that he was saying. The heavy sacrifices that he was willing to make for my sake. And everything felt like pressure sat on my back.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiKaCwQpY2Z
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOMskxqu7td
“You don’t have to do that,” I said.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd3zt6fCYAk
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4NvIPtEdJV
“I do.” No hesitation. “If I’m going to tutor you, I’m not doing it with half an effort. When I set a goal I intend to reach it.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj39Eo4sKT5
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2CmU2aZ9aS
“But...” I, on the other hand, hesitated. “But if you stop now…” I didn’t know what to say. But somehow he knew what to answer.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMKkqkuKBqO
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJYsoYYiUAz
“I am not stopping. I can go back to learning once we’re done.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw16sg4DBsf
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ72EzJsMlB8
Why?96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFgSqaIWbBF
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVRNK15vJWs
“Why would you do all that for someone you don’t even know?”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP32ccknjSm
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkqtfGl3qEl
He paused for a moment and stared at me. As if he was trying to figure out how to answer what I asked.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5nifsj7pGH
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ72XgdWLC9K
“Because you need help,” he finally said.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPzoKgYfgvp
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAd1VYB5tnM
I waited for the rest of it. There wasn’t any.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnI5iFeN7Tu
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ22ruUV82Dd
That’s it? I felt like he was about to say more. Was that really all? Because I needed help, he would ruin his schedule, quit his part-time job and cut into his dream?96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUIZ9kO9qXp
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSo7jWRUZBh
I didn’t understand. I thought I had figured him out. But it felt like what I knew was far too little compared to what I didn’t know.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqyj5KVyurX
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt85jgvakCD
But he continued.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq5DQ2D3OkY
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSdlCj6xwN6
“Honestly, when I first looked at your test papers I was going to say no.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8AvHyNYYMH
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx8ra3J1g7X
Obviously.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv6jhdfi8Wd
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpDR2RfqTyX
“But when I looked at the answers themselves. They weren’t random. You never left a question blank. Every answer had a logic behind it, even when it was completely wrong. That logic came from somewhere. It means you were thinking, not guessing. I saw the hard work written on every answer. They were just tangled up with the wrong methods.” He kept his eyes on me. “If we work the right way, you’ll get a different result.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPrfd16Li9w
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfVnrqtaPTi
I sat with that.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5SMJ4tjIEw
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwSDAOcVRwl
Hard work written on every answer.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl9CK699xMv
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxmLbXrdRSh
I bit my lip. I did give my all. I spent nights reading textbooks I tried to understand. In the end, I wasn’t able to and I thought it was impossible for me. And here was someone looking at the same evidence and arriving at a completely different conclusion.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvW6tHwtbxy
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhCJ3GYsCpa
I wanted to believe it. Can he really make me become a top ten student in a year?96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrMS2hZyBal
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIZEwOuVS8U
I stared at my hands.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRI2WhAYYnG
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7hZx1BINSN
If I worked hard just like him, then maybe? If he thought it was achievable, then maybe? If he was sounding very sure of it… then it might actually be real.

96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUN1WRP2p2k

“But I need some kind of insurance,” he suddenly said. “If I put everything in and you still failed, I need something in return. I don’t like wasting time.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKr5lUMJpci
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2zMhGjzS7N
I nodded. Reluctant. I didn’t know if I could promise not to waste his time.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ538g5CoOFS
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡElEloozA0p
“What is it?” I asked.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhcW9HyArJq
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0wPWg1fFSd
“If you fail an exam. Midterms and finals, for the rest of the year. For every subject you fail, I get five minutes.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT44EjqSgdV
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRf0WLyAbJr
I waited.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5MGx3iIo5e
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7ND7hIoTDm
“Five minutes. To touch you.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM6ZqKuvgN2
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRkyEOZGV0d
The room didn’t move.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGrgXBquIh8
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPLJVORlpQj
I heard the words. I understood the words individually. They just didn’t make sense when I put them together. Assembling into something I couldn’t process correctly.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpJuDau4fRj
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpzZB26YVpt
“Touch me?” I said. I wanted him to say that he was just joking.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWBh00nZzG7
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiOh7IDIOIQ
“Yes.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKQ0Xdk6lr5
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM2okJNrEWl
He wasn’t.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKCj4b4gcpN
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8tWhZwmbTb
My hand tightened slightly on my bag.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSAJRTswwld
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdxlUdKMjlU
Absolutely not. That is supposed to be the answer. Immediate. Clear. Correct.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9DDRfxwdHz
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMqNeYCeoJi
If he failed me on purpose, how could I ever tell? If the consequence of my failure was something that benefited him, what was stopping him from not doing it? He could teach me badly on purpose, or not at all, and collect whatever he wanted from whatever subject I failed.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBQugD1fnkE
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGa37XxdqQP
I needed to say that. I needed to push back on it directly. The words were right there.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiacDmtSByZ
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡieVvplHEW2
I looked at him.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmeeYncGKIN
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeSucVPTwC5
I opened my mouth, but he went first.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI5RF9WSIm9
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9BQugZfgeu
“Don’t misunderstand,” he said. “I’m not going to teach you halfheartedly. When I said top ten, that wasn’t a promise. It’s my intention. And I intend to follow through on it. But I need to know your resolve.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaZm4Yd94Co
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeDtopg0G9D
I didn’t move.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfDTIL6w1ml
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDi1AJZipKW
My resolve?96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHA1iDNbJQB
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSyzQMt50z4
“You don’t have to decide now,” he continued. “You don’t have to decide at all. If you don’t come back, that’s your answer.” He paused. “But if you do come back. Then that’s your answer too. Not just to me. To yourself.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwaDaIdxX7C
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYBiAZKJTiC
I didn’t know what to say to that so I didn’t say anything.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfu7HFCUGgl
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUuQuVYDnrs
“You can go,” he said.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq8OSOtBMjx
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNufuUWV8FI
I didn’t move right away. I didn’t know if I can even move right away.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHRf9jGeN6O
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4g4bOv5NmY
When my eyes reached him, I saw him reading his book again, like he just didn’t say the most outrageous thing to say to a girl.

96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSbGmzvyo8p

For a moment I sat with everything. I felt the weight of what he’d put on the table and the equal weight of what he was offering in return.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXHA2LcRlDL
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9vqbcXa4DP
Finally I stood up. I picked up my bag from the floor and held it against my chest.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuuQYH6NNet
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8DDbxLEiMz
I started walking towards the door, as fast as I could.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD8upCMdoGb
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUUik70ioSY
“The condition stays between us,” he said before I could walk towards the hallway.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7FIAmx7OPN
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnhyjsjyLwZ
I hesitantly nodded. I shouldn’t have. It felt like agreeing to something before I’d decided anything. But I also didn’t want anyone else carrying the weight of this before I’d figured out what I was going to do with it myself.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwiVoNqdUc9
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0zHJ991aXe

I let myself out.

96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsXrewi7mtg

The elevator was waiting. I got in.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6u20XweZGi
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuRdXrKfS1K
What do I do?96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHiHmwNCJH7
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI7mNbGHTDX
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOHFq5shGZy
Wednesday, Night.

96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP06bJ4OJbB
That night I lay in my bed staring at the ceiling with the lights off. Dinner was done. My replies to the group chat were done. Just enough to prove I was alive and accounted for, nothing that invited follow-up questions I wasn’t ready to answer.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTUgRe8K1Ha
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpUDiUqRvmD
The dark was easier right now. Less to look at. More space to think, or to avoid thinking, which was what I was mostly doing.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZLEl0xHiU3
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsrNYMroDDQ
My phone rang.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtN0kI7LDj0
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb8A98rkXbP
Mika.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCAgQbC4gNX
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsftEuo0t4g
I picked up.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhfXNreIAmk
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvrb4ECkPkO
“Hello.”

96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQI5PvErxcu

“Are you okay?”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgD7KZ15xpS
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPnO6YGDIpt
“I am. Don’t worry.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡus2RyMqSQo
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw83yP8Puvr
“Did he do anything?”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa4rTnbUe6n
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2LTH0awndv
“No.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSwP6PgT2jY
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqU2welI4B5
“Are you sure?”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBSdP2j2uWU
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡygWCIrMOnQ
“I’m sure.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKKVCFRLgoW
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEAMbAQYlVs
She didn’t answer for a few seconds.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDYrBYV0qZj
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb7Oi0L34wH
“You don’t sound sure.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡco7ysHYd3r
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR3hF8U2D3n
“I’m just tired.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrUo1SsaO7C
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwUlTJeFcnC
“...Really?”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD3qQbBpdyG
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgKOD3jZXQj
“Yes.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9VtqourmJU
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7M8Iox0EO4
She paused.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvH4YLsRGN6
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRB8s5RWrfk
“Okay.” Her voice was careful. “I’ll let you sleep. But tomorrow, tell me everything.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg3GtiWSrz4
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ12jiFcjB5g
“Okay.”96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ21EozVwj9V
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbQNI0gsCOL
She hung up.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRhJrup1hOy
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdGujdIg6Ns
I lay there in the dark looking at the ceiling.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJhqdArzLTu
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbYfQe5Jm2I
Sorry, Mika.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsPGTIRu68L
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPZMw3WLCLj
I was already apologizing to her in my head. Because I knew, even now, that I wasn’t going to be able to tell her everything. Not even a single word of what had been said.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6HB0stWQjD
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeaLmUJfSJR
That part…96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtWiB4bLUGt
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE9rOw9G4Dm
All of them…96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn9h7Vveafp
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHAUAKi6y9l
Were all mine to carry…96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrbWpRHlCLj
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbnr04nWYVJ
I pressed my hand flat against my chest.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg2QtKVxrh5
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdnAxnhHLvs
What do I do?96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJB1ycHmIg4
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9BCvKFmIjY
The ceiling had no answers. It was just a ceiling.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjLnaS3Wl4l
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM3Bhb3U7j5
But somewhere underneath all the weight of it, quieter than everything else, something was still there.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs22f0F7VN4
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVMZ30r2THf
I saw the hard work written on every answer.96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrMswCC7CIC
96Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo4ZTH7yGjh
I closed my eyes.

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